Sunday, July 15, 2012

Three

I am not sure what is more sad…the fact that I have only posted once this year. Or the fact that I posted in a timely fashion about Heather’s birthday and not about Todd's.

Ahem.

So let’s bring the number of posts for the year up to two by talking about our little man who is now three.

Three?! Yes, three!

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I am an only child. There are many things about the sibling relationship that I struggle with or that just plain don’t make sense to me. I have had fights with my friends. But I don’t think I’ve ever had a relationship where I can be happily playing with another person for half an hour, fighting with them for 5-10 minutes and then happily playing with again as if the fight never happened. Sure, part of this is the relatively short “memory” of pre-schoolers and the quick forgiveness that goes along with that. But I still don’t really get it. I love watching them when they are getting along, but it drives me batty when they are clearly pushing each other’s buttons on purpose.

There are pros and cons of being a second child.

R and I are more relaxed. We generally feel like we know what we’re doing. We weren’t freaked out by bringing a baby home from the hospital, aren’t upset by fevers or tantrums, don’t flinch at the first sounds of unhappiness…that isn’t to say that nothing surprises us. They are clear differences between our two kids and Todd has acted in ways that are different from Heather (tricks that worked on her would never work on him and
vice-versa), but we mostly feel like we have the majors bases covered and it just takes a little experimentation to find the best tricks to handle whatever Todd throws at us.

The downsides of being a second child are probably pretty obvious and predictable. It wouldn’t take long to find a lot more posts on this blog about Heather than Todd, and I would venture that blogging has slowed down in general since Todd was born. Heather will continue to do all of the “firsts” first, and at least in our mind all of Todd’s “firsts” are compared to Heather’s.

(I’m not talking about competitive comparisons, just “isn’t that interesting” comparisons.)

And of course, there are all the things that Todd will have to watch Heather do first and wait for his turn. They are close enough in age that some things that we have put off for Heather (…cough…swim lessons…cough…) will turn into things that they can both do together, but there are lots and lots of milestones that Heather will naturally get to do first.

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Three doesn’t seem as monumental as it did the first time.

Watching Todd turn into a 3-year old has reminded me that there is a lot of Heather’s threes that I have blocked out of my memory. Todd starting acting like a 3-year old a couple of months before his birthday and…whew…did I forget how mentally exhausting it can be! Even my laid back boy can now lose his cool when things don’t go exactly.as.he.wanted.

He can be intensely stubborn and refuses to move onto something other than getting what he wanted. Other times the pronouncement that there is a worm in the backyard or the opportunity to help mommy feed the cats will snap him out of his funk quickly.

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Todd is a charming, sweet, and very lovable little boy. He screams and shouts with delight, he enthusiastically greets the people that he loves and once he has warmed up to you, he will tell you anything about himself or our family. Todd loves babies and loves animals. He will chat and coo to every baby we see, and he will notice immediately if there is a baby in need of attention. He loves visiting our kitties and helping to feed them. He would sit and pet them or play with them all day if they would let him. He has a great time at the zoo and loves playing with the doggies at Grandma Sharon’s house.

Todd definitely has a reserved streak when it comes to new people and new situations. There is a warm-up period required often to get acclimated to “new” people. And when I say new, that even applies to people that we know but haven’t seen in a while. Having Heather around helps him acclimate faster, but it can still take 20-30 minutes for him to adjust. He can be so clingy during these adjustment periods that it feels like he wants to climb back in the womb.*

Todd loves to play outside, to play in water and sand, and to play with any sort of sports equipment. If it involves a ball or a bat, he is happy to join in the game. He even learned to throw a Frisbee this past weekend with his Aunt Tara. When we play inside, he can entertain himself with play-doh or a puzzle or a pile of cars, but it seems like his independent play lasts the longest in sand and water. When we spent time at the beach while we were camping, there were long stretches that he didn’t need to interact with anyone else – he was totally content. Overall, Todd plays well with his sister and with his friends at school, both the girls and boys.

Todd will draw and color, but while we wait at a restaurant he would choose to play a game on an iPhone over crayons every time. He will also watch anything on a screen. Look back at the lists I've posted about the things that Heather watches and the same is true for Todd. We've recently added Diego, Dora, My Little Pony and Babar to the list.

It feels like Todd is very quickly leaving all of the "toddler" behind and moving ahead to little boy status. We saw a toddler this weekend and it is quite amazing to realize how much he has grown and changed in 18 months. We don't even blink when he speaks in long sentences and paragraphs and it seems that each day we discover something else that he can do for himself without help.

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*Description stolen from Michelle at Burgh Baby

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