Five

Sometimes it is daunting to try to capture a moment in time in a blog post. It is easier when I am remembering an anecdote or talking about a specific topic. But I find it almost overwhelming to summarize an age or summarize what my kids are like “right now”. I do it, because I know it is something that my family and I will value in the future.

Heather is five. Five?!

I am not a mother who begrudges her children for growing. They were adorable as babies, but I don’t find babies to be easy and I don’t miss the “why are they crying” guessing game. I love having kids that I can have a conversation with and so far each age has been better than the last, so I am happy for them both to keep getting bigger.

My exclamation is more about excitement and amazement than sadness. I remember the day Heather was born so clearly, it is hard to believe that it was 5 years ago. And I am so thrilled to see her developing into a little person. All of the “older toddler” is gone. I remember that around this time last year a friend of mine with a daughter about the same age was considering the possibility of putting her daughter in Kindergarten a year early. At the time, the thought of Heather being emotionally mature enough to go to Kindergarten seemed SO far away. And now, even though there are still emotional outbursts and difficult moments, they are somehow less out of control than they were last year and imagining her going to Kindergarten this fall seems totally right.

Heather still seems to have a lot in common with the boys in her class – talking about them frequently and enjoying Star Wars, Super Heroes and Cars. But in the past 6 months there has also been a suddenly awakened interest in princesses, Barbies, ballet and wearing dresses. If your goal is to pinpoint girls as being tomboys or girly-girls, Heather will give you a run for your money. Which is fine by me. I grew up with Barbies and matchbox cars, too.

Heather started taking dance class and loves it. She has also found a passion in drawing and doing puzzles. Within the past few months, she is drawing a ton and can be easily occupied with a pad of paper and markers while I make dinner. The only “downside” to all of the drawing is trying to figure out how to manage all of the results of her artistic efforts. ;-)

More & more she can be depended on to do little things to help out around the house (although toy clean-up still remains an elusive issue we need to solve as a family). Heather is a happy, helpful and cheerful girl who enjoys her friends as well as her quiet playtime. On the playground, she is a good mixture of careful and carefree - not taking unreasonable risks while also not being afraid to try something new.

I went back and read what I wrote last year. Four

Quite a lot of it still applies. There are more movies on the list, including several Star Wars episodes (we started with Episode 4, of course) and The Lion King, as well as recent runs of Shaun the Sheep and Martha Speaks for our morning TV.

In general, I will say that four was an awesome age and I have high expectations for the year to come!

Plans for 2012...

In a number of different ways, 2011 was a very disorganized year. It seemed that each time I began to eek out a “new normal”, something else out of my control would change and upset whatever balance I had found.

I keep thinking to myself “Goodbye 2011! Don’t let the door hit you on the arse on your way out and good riddance! Hellooooooo 2012!”

2011 certainly wasn’t all bad. There were a lot of fun times, Heather has shown us that age four is awesome in many ways, Todd has exploded onto the scene with his personality & charm and I am employed full-time again. As I’ve said in the past, we have a lot to be thankful for. Yet 2011 was a hard year in many ways, so it is somewhat gratifying to see it in the rear view mirror and prepare for a “fresh start”.

Out of all of the challenges of 2011, I find myself reconsidering my priorities and refocusing on the things I really want. Thinking about how I spend my time, what I would rather spend less time on and what things make me happy. I can’t say that I have figured it all out yet. It is still a work in progress, of course, but I feel like I am getting a handle on some of the changes I want to make.

I started to write about these priorities and realized that the ideas and their place in line are still forming in my head. So hopefully I will be back soon with more concrete thoughts about changes I want to work toward next year.

Oh-Ver-Whelmed

The holidays are just adding another layer of crazy to a 10 layer crazy salad.

I need to write about it, but I’m not complaining. I know how incredibly lucky we are. I’m happy that we have two smart kids who know what they want and want to do everything themselves. (A hard job now, but will make them awesome adults someday.) I’m thrilled that one of my “problems” is adjusting to my new job and our new everyday life. I’m thankful that we’re healthy, have a roof over our head, have the food and clothes that we need, and that we can afford to get the kids just what they want for Christmas. I’m thankful for a new laptop, the ability to continue teaching at the yarn shop and the possibilities for having knit and crochet designs published in 2012. I’m thankful for my dishwasher, washing machine and dryer for making my tasks easier, even if they aren’t smart enough to fill and empty themselves.

Most of the things on my to do list are not hard, they just take time. And I feel like I am too often sacrificing sleep for the things on the list. Which I know is just as bad, if not worse, than having a messy house.

Quite frankly, a number of things are on that list now so that I can ENJOY and RELAX during my two days off at home for the holidays. On Christmas and the day after I just want to enjoy time with family and enjoy time in the house I love, without feeling like I should take a few minutes to vacuum or go through a pile. And let’s face it, if I am going to do any organizing or cleaning during those two days, my efforts should be focused on helping the kids find places to store their new toys!

I also can’t wait to give our family members this year’s pictures of the kids and to send out what I’m sure will be an adorable card using said pictures. But I still need to get through the agonizingly difficult process of picking the handful of pictures to use from the big stack that she gave us. I am thankful to know someone so talented, but my job would be a lot easier if there weren’t so many great images to choose from! (I’ll show you some once presents have been given.)

Now that I’m employed, the biggest problem we have is a cat issue. It has changed and grown over time, and I have reached a point that I just need it to be fixed…and we found someone to help us and give us a list of things to do to fix it. Which will be fabulous in the long run, but in the short term just adds another layer of items to the task list. I really wish we would have known about this person years ago…but all we can do now is move forward and figure out the right strategy for this point in time. I think it might be less complicated if we had more rooms in our house with doors. :-)

Good Weekend

Each time I tried to compose a facebook status update about how nicely the weekend was going, it was much too long for that format and it was hard to express some of my thoughts without sounding cranky. So I must need to right a blog post about it.

 

Friday was the holiday luncheon with my new employer, followed by a 2-hour early release for the weekend, giving me time to cross a few items off my list while I was home alone. The kids came home happy, the house was reasonable straight to be seen by someone new (this weekend’s babysitter was coming for the first time) and the homemade pizza was ready for the oven on time. Despite some initial shyness (that is Todd’s MO with many people lately and since the babysitter was his teacher, Heather doesn’t know her as well), the kids had fun and we returned home to a glowing report of their good behavior. It is always nice to hear that what we are trying to teach the kids is sinking in, even if that isn’t clear on a day to day basis to us.

 

R and I had a lovely dinner. The food was excellent and we covered the topics on my list. (The more that is going on, the more lists I make.) These are discussions that I find it hard to have at 9:30 or 10pm when all I want to do is relax my brain and go to sleep. I feel better now that some decisions are made and there is less pressure for us to have a “big” discussion on a weeknight after doing an hour of chores.

 

After we ate, we went shopping for my Christmas present – a new laptop! My old laptop has been in need of replacement for a while…and I don’t think we could have shopped for it successfully with the kids along. This time I specifically went for a lightweight model and I think it has the speed and storage to last me for a good, long while. And hopefully the battery life will live up to their promises, too.

 

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Saturday was our activity and errand day. We went to Phipps to see Santa, and have our annual visit to see the trains and flowers. I think when the kids are older we’ll spring for a membership and try to go a few more times a year, but there are so many great places to go in Pittsburgh, this hasn’t risen up our list yet. Santa was great, as always – kind, chatty and not in a rush

Heather asked Santa for a Belle and Cinderella. Todd refused to sit on Santa’s lap and barely made eye contact with him, so Heather let Santa know that Todd wants “Christmas Lights” this year. His previous answer was “presents”, so at least his revised answer is more specific. :-) Now that requests have been made officially, the elves can get to work. And the elves are very happy that they didn’t shop early since these requests just materialized in the past week…

 

After lunch, we bought Heather’s first ballet outfit. She starts class in a couple of weeks. The class is run in the same building as daycare, so it doesn’t currently add any event to our calendar other than making sure her attire is clean and present on the right day. And then while the family had movie/nap time, I did some shopping for Christmas and groceries, knocking a few more items off my massive December to-do list.

 

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Sunday was designated to decorate the house for Christmas. Given our recent mild temperatures, R had already done the outside decorating and put up some window lights. We got a lot done, especially when you consider that we usually use the long Thanksgiving weekend for decorating. 

 

But this is where I’m going to sound cranky. I don’t want to wish the time away. I love the ages that the kids are at now…but when it comes to decorating for Christmas I am looking forward to the kids being old enough to help without making the process more stressful. Between the random unpacking of decorations, the leaving of ornaments on the floor, the concern that ornaments will be dropped or broken, the impatience to decorate *now* and the following boredom half an hour later…I just found it making me very stressed out yesterday. I suppose that “ideally” the prep work of unpacking and putting lights on the trees would be done while the kids are otherwise occupied, but that didn’t work out this year and I would like them to really be able to help.

 

I have to give Heather credit. She lasted a lot longer in the process than Todd did and other than a few branches that had 2 ornaments, she did really help with tree decorating. (Todd’s fullest branch had 5 ornaments on it…) But she still required a lot of direction and she isn’t immune to the dropping problem (maybe we need to get a carpet remnant to put under the tree?).

 

I also kind of hate how the decorating process makes the house look so messy. I need to dust as I do the mantles and put out the knick knacks this week, and a post-decorating vacuum is definitely in order. I know that the result will be fabulous, it just felt like a lot of work yesterday, and there is still more to try to finish (hopefully) before the week is out. Part of it is internal pressure to go into the holiday with a house that feels clean. I only have two days off at home, and I don’t want to feel like I should spend them cleaning (other than maybe organizing the kids’ new toys)!

 

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You can see how I was having issues coming up with a concise and happy facebook update. ;-)

This Weekend

Things I’m looking forward to this long weekend (in no particular order):

1 – Spending time with the kids while they are surrounded by relatives and friends someplace other than our house. This means that I won’t be multi-tasking on chores while spending time with them and they will (probably) be on their best behavior because of the other people. Also, they will spend time playing with others while I sit and watch (and knit).

2 – Lots of time to knit and crochet in the car.

3 – Eating the pumpkin pie that I’m making for Thursday using my Great-Grandmother’s recipe. It is easy and it is my favorite pumpkin pie in the world.

4 – Time spent with family and friends. I expect to see some people that I really like that we don’t get to see very often. And I am hopeful for time that is relaxed and calm.

5 – Good food that I don’t have to cook. I will have some responsibility food-wise – the pie and the general task of making sure that there are healthy snacks around to keep the kids from getting hungry between meals. Also, making sure we have meals on a reasonable schedule as to not make the kids irritable or throw off bedtime. But thankfully, as they get older, the latter is better since they can mostly express when they are hungry.

6 – Not setting an alarm for four days. Yes, it is likely that the kids will wake us up before we necessarily want to be up, but it is still better than my alarm going off at 6am. And last time we were with my parents, the kids got up to play with them and let me sleep a little longer.

7 – I have a lot to do during the next two evenings to prepare for the weekend, so getting to Thursday morning should mean that my tasks are done. Hopefully.

Part of the reason I am focusing on these things is because there is a somber aspect to the weekend as well. This is the beginning of our first holiday season without my father-in-law and without my grandfather. I am not looking forward to the emotion and the sadness, but I know that it is part of the grieving process and I am thankful to have my energetic children to constantly remind me to live in the moment. There is actually something a little….refreshing (not quite right, but I lack of a better word) about talking with a 4 year old about death. It is a very straightforward conversation in that it is best to give straightforward and clear answers. The hard part is not really knowing what question will be thrown at you next.

Also, this post is to remind myself that the craziness and late nights this week will be worth it for the sake of our weekend together.

I hope, dear readers, you have a wonderful weekend with people that you love.

Fall Chops

Have you ever found a recipe that sounded just perfect, but it took a half dozen tries to get it to really work and meet your vision? I just finally realized the desired goal last night on a pork chop crockpot recipe that I probably found over a year ago.

orange-apricot-pork-chops-in-crockpot

Ha, ha. Look – it was almost 3 years ago that is was posted, so I would guess that I tried it for the first time while I was on maternity leave with Todd. So it has taken me this long to get the recipe right *and* figure out my crockpot.

I’ve had pulled pork. I know that it is possible to get that kind of tenderness, and yet each time that I made the recipe we had meat that needed to be cut with a serrated knife and that had to be completely drenched in sauce from the first bite to the last. I knew it could be better, but it took me a while to figure out why I was having so many issues.

First, the issue with my crockpot. It is a very basic model. And honestly, I have no problem with that. I can hook it up to a timer if I need to it to start after I leave the house, I tend to simmer things on low all day while we’re at work and I have made a variety of yummy foods in it for the 4-5 years that I’ve had it. The “problem” is that the heat dial just goes from 1 to 5. There is no “warm”, no “low”, nothing specific about temperatures or that relates to the way that crockpot recipes are usually written. So this is the recipe that finally taught me that 1 is “warm” and 2 is “low”. I decided that there was enough liquid in the pot that I could afford to try heating the pork chops on 2 yesterday, and the results were perfect. Fall apart when you just look at it, perfectly cooked pork.

Second, in the past I have stuck literally to the directions in the blog post, but I found that when I emptied the can of mandarin oranges over everything else, it pushed the sweet and savory jam mixture off the top of the chops, leaving them with just a few orange slices on top and the jam mixture diluted in the crock.

So here are my directions for this yummy recipe that seems to me like perfect fall fare. The orange and clove smell emanating from the kitchen reminds me of the wassail I make for the holidays. Yum!

3-4 Pork chops (I use boneless)
2, 10.5 oz cans of mandarin oranges
1 cup apricot jam (I also like peach or a peach/apricot mixture. You can use orange marmalade as well.)
3 Tbsp brown sugar
1 tsp salt
½ tsp pepper
½ tsp cinnamon
¼ tsp ginger (You could use more if you like more “kick”)
¼ tsp whole cloves

Put pork chops in the crockpot. Pour cans of mandarin oranges (including juice) over them, leaving at least 5-6 orange slices on each chop.

In a small bowl, stir together remaining ingredients, except cloves. Dollop mixture evenly over chops and oranges. Then sprinkle cloves over the whole thing. (This makes it easier to find and remove them before serving)

Cover and cook on low for 10 hours. It might not need that long, but that's the length of time I'm away from the house on a weekday.

Someday, when my kids will eat rice, I will serve this with rice because I think the rice would absorb the extra sauce nicely.

(Enjoy the picture on the original blog because it didn’t even cross my mind to take one last night.)

More Kid than Toddler

Yesterday was election day. Neither R or I made time to go to the polls before work, so that meant that we had to go in the 2+ hours between arriving home from work and the closing of the polls at 8pm. This is a busy time in our house – making dinner, bargaining snacks, talking about our days, enjoying time with the kids while trying not to rile them up before bed, getting ready for bed, bath or shower, wind down and getting the kids to sleep. (That last part is still taking a bit of time with Todd, but I’m working on it and it’s getting better…)

R went to the polls while I got dinner started and gave the kids a snack (aka, something from their Trick or Treat bags) in the kitchen. Sometimes having the kids in the kitchen while I’m cooking is a disaster and sometimes it is lovely. Never can tell for sure. Last night was good, maybe just because the kids got the snack they wanted. ;-) As soon as the food had 15 minutes of simmering to go and R was back, Heather and I walked over to the polls together.

Two bits to share from this:

1) Heather and I had a nice little walk. We vote at the elementary school around the corner. Heather seems to be more free flowing with information about her day when we are walking together (rather than being questioned during dinner). And as she is still less “needy” than Todd, there are times that she doesn’t get as much attention from me. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not purposefully ignoring her. But for example, in the rush of the morning routine, I am busy getting myself ready and attending to Todd’s needs. I don’t generally get up earlier than absolutely necessary, and she spends time watching TV to help her “wake up”. This combination means that the two of us don’t usually talk much on weekday mornings. Now that it is dark out by the time we get home it feels harder to make little walks like this happen, but truthfully we could still do it when the weather is mild.

2) While R was voting and I was cooking, I let the kids know my plan to go vote when daddy got back. Heather’s suggestion was that she could watch Todd while daddy and I left to vote together. She’s 4 ½. I fully expect that at some point she will be watching her little brother at home without a parent present (and she already does some “supervising” of him while we’re in a different room), but I don’t think it’s time yet for us to leave the house. I suppose I’m beginning to wonder when that will be. I certainly think that we have a ways to go…but I suppose we’ll dip our toes in the world of more independence when she heads off to Kindergarten next year. It will be interesting to see what that looks like.